Europe
Stagehand: Curtain call, five minutes, ladies…
Doris: He wanted to put it where?
Ethel: Me back passage.
Doris: But, Ethel… That’s tiny.
Ethel: I know, that’s what I said, wouldn’t listen though. He gave it a good try and got covered in oil, the silly goose. Told him, to stick it round front.
“Voglio spedire un telegramma per Londra.” “Certo. Inglese?” “Si.” Adam Fletcher pulled out a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped the sweat from his brow as the young lady behind the counter at the Poste e Telegrafi stepped off her small stool to reach one of the blank telegram forms behind her. She picked up [...]
The Senators stepped away from Julius Caesar who dropped down to his knees in shock and began to straighten his robes. His heart still beat strong and the blood flowed thick and heavy over his fingertips as he looked up in sorrow at those who had conspired against him. His look then turned to rage [...]
“I say, what a marvelous cock!”
I was so pleased the Vicar had noticed on this splendid spring day. Last year he had seemed to be obsessed by Lady Watson’s tits, and if we’re being perfectly honest, we would have to admit to agreeing they were a most magnificent pair, and most worthy of the prestigious Best Birds award in the Kensington and Chelsea Annual Ornithology Show 1911. But this was 1912. A whole year had passed. A year in which I had spent a great deal of time preparing and nurturing my Spangling Green Cock.
I wonder what your reaction would be if I told you about the chap opposite me who was given hydrochloric acid instead of water this morning. Or of the person in the bed next to me, who I watched peel back all of his fingernails, one by one, the other day. I wonder if I [...]
How wonderful to see you at the races, Duchess Bloemfontein, Ladies.
Oh I had a bit of trouble at the gate, seems my invitation to the enclosure must have got lost in the post this year.
No, one of the three things I promised my mammy I would never do:
1) Never trust a man from Tramore
2) Never fight for the English
3) Never bet on the Horses
Some more Gentlemen’s Spice Asquith: You know Georgie? Browne: Do I ? Rather! Went for a spin in that ferocious motorcar of his the other week. Asquith: We were out around Piccadilly last Friday. Browne: Bet it was a right hoot! Last time I was out with him, practically emptied the bar at the Strand. Next morning, [...]
Newton! That is all they go on about. Can they not see how narrow-minded they are ? They take that man’s work as gospel. I am surprised they haven’t yet built a building to worship him in and arranged a weekly service.
Continue reading about The Last Page Of Henry Lamberton’s Journal
My dear lords and gentlemen. How wonderful it is to be in this room, right next door to the great hall where so many great speakers have spoken.